31st Golden Raspberry Awards...Who Won and Some Thoughts

Hello I am the movie encyclopedia and if no one else will see it, I will.


Well the Oscars are upon us and no doubt sometime before the festivities (and my live blog of the event which you should follow during the show) I will inevitably post who I think will win the golden statues, but one thing that seems to get overlooked every year is the Razzies. The Razzies may not have the glitz and glam, production values or Red Carpet like the Oscars but they are just as pivotal to Oscar Week as the Oscars themselves. 


The Razzies honor the WORST in film every year since 1981. Founded by John Wilson during his annual Oscar potluck and after watching a double feature of Can't Stop the Music and Xanadu, Wilson decided to turn his potluck into an impromptu award show and give out awards to the worst the film industry had to offer. Soon it began to pick up popularity and now it is a formal award show held the day before the Oscars. I always look forward to seeing what wins the worst of the worst, so I figured I'd share my thoughts on this year's award ceremony.


Let's start with the big one right off the bat: Worst Picture.


Worst Picture: "The Last Airbender"

Not really a surprise when you think about it, and definitely not a surprise considering that the film that wins Worst Screenplay(with the exception of 4 occasions), always wins Worst Picture. The Last Airbender is no different and is deserving of it's award for Worst Picture. It was a poor adaptation of a classic animated series, it was dull, the 3D was painful, the acting sucked and it was the first film in a long time where I literally felt like I had just wasted two hours of my life. That said it DID have some tough competition (Vampires Suck, Bounty Hunter, SATC2) but overall a good choice by Wilson and Co.



Worst Director: M. Night Shyamalan, "The Last Airbender"

Like with Worst Picture, the award for Worst Director usually goes to the film that wins Worst Screenplay. However, there have been multiple occasions where the film that wins Worst Picture/Screenplay doesn't win Worst Director. But have no fear this year continues that time honored tradition with the Worst Director award going to M. Night Shyamalan. 


I honestly feel bad for the guy. He started off with great promise and he certainly knows what he's doing behind a camera (or at least I think so) but since Sixth Sense he just hasn't been able to create a memorable film that truly showcased his abilities. Instead we get half-assed messes like The Village, The Happening and Last Airbender. Someday I would like for him to get out of this unending rut he seems to be in, but unfortunately I don't think that will be happening anytime soon.




Worst Actor: Ashton Kutcher, "Killers" and "Valentine's Day"

Not really sure I agree with this award to be quite honest. I mean I'm not really a fan of the guy but compared to the other nominees I really think one of them should have won. When you have people like Taylor Lautner, Robert Pattinson and Jack Black all in the same category (I genuinely like Gerard Butler), it seems odd that Ashton would win. Valentine's Day and Killers were both duds but I blame the rest of the cast for the failure of both movies and less for Ashton's input. I mean he's an actor who is just THERE. He lets everyone else do the hard work. Oh well. It's not like Jack Black will never be nominated again.



Worst Actress: Sarah Jessica Parker, Kim Cattrall, Kristin Davis and Cynthia Nixon, "Sex and the City 2"

If I'm going to be honest I thought Miley Cyrus or Megan Fox would have won but really...the "Four Gal Pals" have more suck per square inch than Miley and Megan combined. I actually enjoyed the show when I got the chance to watch it and the first movie wasn't terrible, but the second was a horrible, miserable excuse for a film and should be burned and buried with the copies of E.T. The Video Game. And we have these four to blame for that. And the screenwriter, but Michael Patrick King probably already knew that. The Gal Pals are blissfully unaware of how horrible they truly were.



Worst Supporting Actor: Jackson Rathbone, "The Last Airbender" and "The Twilight Saga: Eclipse"

He must have really pissed off some members of the voting committee to beat out Rob Schneider, George Lopez and Billy Ray Cyrus. Just writing those three names cause me to hurt so imagine the pain the voting committee must feel writing Jackson's name. Granted he's not much of an actor and he's a bit boring to watch but I'm stunned he beat such esteemed F-Listers.



Worst Supporting Actress: Jessica Alba, "The Killer Inside Me," "Little Fockers," "Machete" and "Valentine's Day"

Looking at the nominees my first thought was "Are these the Grammy's or the Razzies?" Cher, Liza Minnelli, Barbra Streisand are all among the nominees along with Jessica Alba and Nicola Peltz. Does Alba deserve this award? Oh yeah. Despite loving The Killer Inside Me and enjoying Machete, Little Fockers, and Valentines Day were terrible. And even in Machete she was a bit of a weak link. Like the Gal Pals, she has volume going for her. She's done more movies (and consequently more crap) then any of the other nominees. So she was really a shoe in from the get go.



Worst Screen Couple of Ensemble: "Sex and the City 2"

...See Worst Actress. But for a second opinion let's go to Justin Beiber. Justin?

He doesn't like SATC2 and the Gal Pals either. I figured there was SOME sense in him.



Worst Screenplay: M. Night Shyamalan, "The Last Airbender"

Tsk, tsk, tsk. Come on man! You are a talented writer! I know you can do better than the Last Airbender. Considering you are a "fan" of the show I thought you would have made the movie much better. And I can sort of forgive you since it's hard trying to fit an entire season into one movie. But that doesn't make up for boring scenes of nothingness, asinine dialogue and no direction in your story, Please get better. Quickly...otherwise you'll end up being the laughingstock of film. People already groan at your name, don't add laughter.



Worst Prequel, Remake, Rip-off or Sequel: "Sex and the City 2"

With another opinion of the movie let's go to the Ginger's Have Souls Kid....Kid?

Thought so. Yeah If not for Last Airbender, I'm pretty sure SATC2 would have won everything, except Worst Actor...well maybe that too.



Worst Eye-Gouging Misuse of 3D: "The Last Airbender"



Not as cool as it looks at first glance and certainly not any better in 3D. Dark, poorly done and a sad excuse to get more money out of this already deep money pit. Sigh...


Well that about does it for this years Razzies. I will see you all at the Oscars.