Thursday, March 8, 2012
I'll Sleep When He's Dead
I didn't expect a whole lot going into Gone. While I believe Amanda Seyfried is a competent actress, I'm hard pressed to think of a movie she's been in lately that could be considered "good." Add that to a trailer that made my eyes roll like a tire in the Indy 500 and you have a film that, before I even sat in the theater, I was already dreading. That said, I love to be surprised when I go to the theater and even if the film wasn't "great," as long as it had a decent story and/or acting, I'd be satisfied. Well it has neither. In fact I'd go so far to say that Gone has one of the most confounding, convoluted, piss-poor screenplays I have ever sat through and features bland, phoned-in acting across the board. If 30 minutes into a film I've almost cut my head open from facepalming repeatedly, your film is dead in the water and needs to be taken out back and shot.
That's sound logic right? I mean there are more developments that make her theory a little more sound but for someone who is twenty or so minutes into a movie, a mentally unstable woman with a gun hunting down a guy that may not exist for a sister that is probably not actually missing a good film does not make. What's worse is that everything is incredibly predicable and almost every scene plays right out of a fill-in-the-blanks book. I mean I'm fine with some predictability, but when you can telegraph a scene that goes on for a good ten minutes, it's bad and it comes off as padding. AND THIS FILM PADS. I swear they put one scene in towards the end because otherwise the film would only be an hour long. Even when it's a halfway decent scene or a scene that's harder to predict, it's boring, poorly acted and full of holes. Basically you can't win.
Nothing in this movie clicks and it's frustratingly bad and downright incompetent. It's full of plot holes, poor logic, useless padding and terrible acting. Even if you love Seyfried, heck even if someone PAID you, don't watch this film. You'll thank me later.
MY VERDICT: ABOMINATION TO CINEMA